I have B.A.'s in psychology and education, and I'm
always interested in the human condition. I have two grown children. I
stumbled across your home page and saw with interest that your child has
been homeschooled, and I assume, never had the corporal punishment
experience. I would love to hear about some of your experiences raising
a child in this manner; the good and the bad stories.
I have seen some nightmarish results from parents
experimenting with an ultra-lenient, ultra-sensitive style of
upbringing. I see what is happening in the public school systems (I am a
certified elementary school teacher) and I fear for the future of our
children and our nation. There appears to be a complete breakdown in
discipline, morality, and education across our entire society. how has
your child's upbringing dealt with these issues?
Brian de Geer
Many parents describe methods of parental guidance according to the degree that they
are "lenient" or "punitive", when in reality it is
possible - and preferable - to take an entirely different approach by
simply accepting that a child is a human being who deserves to be
treated with dignity and respect. This is not "lenient", it is
humane and fair; it is also the most effective means for gaining
cooperation and good will.
With this approach, it can be possible, and
even effortless and joyful, to provide responsible direction for a child
in a non-hurtful way. Kindness does not mean "laissez-faire".
At the same time, parental authority must not mean callousness. It truly
is possible to be both responsible and kind. It can be difficult,
though, if the parent rarely received this kind of treatment from his or
her own parents.
Don't Really Misbehave
Children Really React to Control
Parenting Golden Rule
Protective Use of Force
Alternatives to Punishment